By Josh Gottlieb

As we approach the New Year, one of the biggest stories here at Briarcliff High School is the administration’s decision to eliminate midterm week.

Let me be clear – I am all for teachers testing students on the entire curriculum learned up to the half-way point of the year. This school needs to test its students at this time. However, midterms were just too stressful. Thankfully, this year those dreaded midterms will be replaced by the much less stressful cumulative mid-year exams.

What is the difference between a midterm and a cumulative mid-year exam? I’m glad you asked. You see one is called a midterm; the other is a cumulative mid-year exam. One of them tests on the curriculum taught in a class up to the half-way point of the year, while the other tests on the curriculum taught in a class up to the half-way point of the year. The differences speak for themselves.

Critics of this solution argue that there is essentially no difference between cumulative mid-year exams and midterms. But that is preposterous. Saying there is no difference between a cumulative mid-year exam and a midterm is like saying that there is no difference between a hot dog and a frank footer! It would be like saying there is no difference between Ron Artest and Metta World Peace! Once again, the differences speak for themselves.

However, the benefits of the gift that is the cumulative mid-year exam do not stop there. As a senior, one of the things that I hated about midterm week was that I would only have one test per day. Talk about an inefficient use of time! That is why I am so glad that cumulative mid-year exams are not constrained by time. There is no “cumulative mid-year exam week.” As a result, I can now have two cumulative mid-year exams on the same day. They say it takes two to tango, and now that I can tango, I now realize that I am completely stressed out about my Spanish cumulative mid-year exam.

As with every decision that this school has made thus far, I can find no problems with the cumulative mid-year exam. It is obvious that the cumulative mid-year exams are significantly better than the midterms, and I am certain that every teacher and student agrees with me. Overall, I would love to continue to talk about the benefits of the cumulative mid-year exams, but I need to go study for them; I am so stressed out.